Randomity

Sometimes, you bang your head against the wall and can't come up with anything interesting to write about.

And so, you just write a tiny, little bit about everything.

- I saw a piece of the movie Rock Of Ages this past weekend. I hadn't heard a single good thing about it from anyone anywhere, but I was stuck in a hotel room and thought I'd see for myself. Sheesh.

First of all, it's no secret that I'm a fan of '80s rock and a firm believer that sappy, tacky, or any other label you want thrown on that kind of music, the fact remains that you had to be a pretty darn good musician to cut a viable record back before the days of AutoTune & digital editing. Say what you will about those bands and the over-the-top ridiculousness they all got themselves into - those dudes could play. And sing.

And the singing, specifically, is what sinks Rock Of Ages. Long-story-short, if you're going to make fun of something, make sure you've got the chops yourself to do it without looking like a total poser. What becomes abundantly clear watching that movie is that all the people involved were in way over their heads, even with the benefit of digital vocal fixes (a benefit, I might point out again, the original artists didn't have when they recorded the tunes the first time).

So be careful when you jump on the societal bandwagon to label something ridiculous. If there's more talent in what you're making fun of than in the entire crew of people making fun of it, maybe you should rethink your decision to be a part of it.

- Beyonce got in a little bit of hot water this week when she released her new single. The song, basically, taunts other female musicians by telling them to bow down and then addressing them with, well.... an invective synonymous with the name usually reserved for a female dog. So, after 15 years or so of singing songs that have as their core message the empowerment of women and the beauty of female strength, Beyonce has attempted to put a cap on that expectation: rock the world all you want, but don't ever think you'll be as big as Beyonce.

And so, Beyonce has established herself as the queen bee of the musical world. So be it. What I really found interesting about all of this ruckus was that she took any heat over the song at all. In my own mind, I had sort of put Beyonce into that category of pop star that most of the so-called civilized world thinks can do no wrong - a person so famous, so successful, and so steeped in celebrity that any possible criticism ever leveled in her direction could only serve to illustrate the inept lack of conformity & pop culture coolness of the person concocting the criticism and not a valid critique of the "art" in question (which is, by definition, above reproach). 'Ya know, a status she shares with the likes of her husband, Justin Timberlake, U2, Adele, and a few other notable musical acts.

I guess I'm here to say that I'm glad to be proven wrong, at least in this one case. An overemphasis on celebrity tends to be detrimental to artistic excellence - both in individual cases and as a more general rule. The idea that an artist can be so revered (as a celebrity) that they are allowed to define what excellence in art is simply through putting out whatever they put out is anathema to the growth of true art. Rolling Stone magazine insisted that U2's latest album was the best thing they'd done since The Joshua Tree. Rolling Stone was very wrong. If we insist on judging art according to standards of social status symbols and cool points, the excellence of the art we celebrate will deteriorate right before our very eyes.

- Here's a quick look at what I've been listening to lately:

• Smokey Mary by Harry Connick, Jr.: Connick's latest trip through the music of Nawlins and Mardi Gras is a fun one, to be sure. Lots of cool grooves and fun vocal melodies, replete with the monster instrumentation we've come to expect from this living legend.
• Greatest Hits by Journey: this is one of those great '80s rock albums everyone should own. If you can't have a good time listening to music like this, I'm not sure I'll ever have much of anything to offer you.
• Greatest Hits by Thelonious Monk: nothing like great, listenable jazz. Monk is one of the great pianists in the music's history, and it's just really fun to say "Thelonious". Try it. See? I would never lie to you.

- This is cool.